A Slower Morning, A Stronger You
Why it matters, and how to (finally) make it happen.
I asked some friends for one word to describe how they feel when they wake up. The words I heard repeated: “behind” and “anxious.”
We roll over to check our phones before we even register our own breath. We absorb, react, plan, reply before we’ve even said good morning to ourselves.
When that energy becomes the first beat of the day, the rest will follow. We feel exhausted, scattered, and stretched thin because the day didn't start on our terms.
It started on default settings.
Your morning is the foundation for how you meet the world the rest of the day. When you approach your mornings intentionally - even in the tiniest ways - you send a signal to yourself: I am choosing my path, not chasing it.
This doesn’t mean you need to join the 5AM club, a color-coded gratitude journal, or a 14-step skincare regimen to get the benefits of a consistent morning routine, which a Harvard study established makes you more likely to be focused, productive, and satisfied throughout your day.
I am asking you to simply reclaim the first 10–30 minutes as yours as a quiet rebellion against autopilot. Pretend to the rest of the world that you’re still asleep, and hence unavailable to anybody but yourself as a vote in favor of your sovereignty.
What My Morning Actually Looks Like.
These days I start my day at 6am - sabbatical life has given me the luxury of an extra 30 minutes of sleep (I used to wake with a 5 handle). I also consider “morning” in this case to be just the time I have to myself before I interact with anybody or anything. That time for me is usually from 6-6:30am.
Wake up slowly (5 - 10 minutes):
I am not a person who can hop right out of bed (it feels too abrupt), but I also don’t snooze again because the next wake up just gets harder. The slow rise is a nice way to tell my body, it’s time to start the day, but on my own time.
Tis the season that I wake up naturally (thank you daylight savings), but during the winter I use a Hatch alarm clock. If you take anything away from this, do not use your phone as an alarm. For the love of sanity, get it off your bedside table!
I prop myself up, but stay in bed awake with my eyes open, but still. Just breathing, oh so cozy, I think about my day - how I want to feel and what I want to accomplish. Also I savor a moment of gratitude and prayer (I consider myself spiritual, not religious).
Touch real things (5 -10 minutes)
Before you get pulled into pixels and outside demands, ground yourself. What is it for you? Morning Pages? Touch grass? Anchor yourself to a tactile world in a way that gives you ritual rather than routine.
I reach for a daily affirmation - reading now from The Book of Awakening.
Take my supplements and thyroid medication with a full glass of water.
Quietly brush teeth, Gua Sha, and apply eye patches. (There was a time when, sucked into chaos, I would walk around with my toothbrush.)
Pour coffee. I take mine with half & half, cinnamon, collagen powder, and a couple of Brazil nuts to mitigate the acidity on an empty stomach.
First outside input (5 - 10 minutes)
The first thing you consume often sets the tone for how you consume the rest of the day. What is it for you? A Podcast? Music?
I get a real paper newspaper! I prefer one point of curated information vs pushed updates that just spike my cortisol via an algorithm.
So this means I’m spending at least 15 minutes, at most 30 minutes on non- negotiables before the rush of the day begins. Depending on how much support I have getting the kiddos off to school, my most perfect morning also includes 20 minutes of Yoga.
Why It Matters More Than You Think
Intentional mornings aren’t about productivity hacks. This is not a trend. It’s about belonging to yourself before the world starts asking you to belong to everything else.
How you meet your mornings shapes how you meet your relationships, your work, your creativity - and ultimately, yourself. It’s never too early (or too late) to start being intentional about your morning. My 12 year old son now has his own practice, and so does my mom. You’re building systems that may live inside for decades. You are not just "getting through" the day when you start the day on your terms.
Expansion Exercise for Today: What was your morning like today? What parts felt good? What didn’t? What’s one small way you could start tomorrow differently without changing the alarm clock?
Expansion Exercise for Tomorrow: What does your perfect morning look like on the weekday? What about the weekend? What time does it require you to wake up? Let’s try it!
Expansion Exercise for next Month: How did it go? Do you need to calibrate anything - did you have enough time? Did it feel rejuvenating or did you over complicate it? Now calibrate from “perfect” to “good enough” and let’s commit to that for the next 30 days.
✨ I'd love to hear what is working (or not working). I’ll start a chat for anybody who would like to share their morning ritual. Let’s build mornings that build us.
Loved this thank you for writing - love the intentionality and self care of this.
My mornings go like this:
First, I check WeChat (I have many relatives and friends in China who might have messaged me while I was asleep) and reply to any urgent messages.
I like to choose a toothpaste with different flavors or textures depending on how I feel when I wake up. Yes, I have *a lot* of toothpaste 🤩. I always brush my teeth slowly with my eyes closed, listening to the soft "swish-swish" sound. This is usually the purest moment of enjoyment in my day.
After leaving the bathroom, I spend about ten minutes silently reciting the Heart Sutra (Prajnaparamita Hridaya Sutra). I’m not a Buddhist, but I’ve kept this practice for ten years.
Then, if I have time, I do ten minutes of stretching—either yoga or Pilates.
Next, I go downstairs, where my dog is waiting for me, wagging his tail. His breakfast is given during a 15-minute training session. He usually completes his tasks well.
My breakfast is usually a cup of Pu-erh tea and a small sweet treat. I often add half a cup of soy milk to my tea.
After breakfast, I quickly check and handle work messages. Then, I run 10 kilometers on the treadmill while watching the news or interesting videos. My dog usually takes another nap while watching me run. After finishing, he shares a banana with me. And then, I start my day!